Hello, bookworms!
Happy Friday, what are you up to this weekend? I am planning on catching up with some reading I have left behind, and also maybe watch a movie. I am not entirely sure what I want to watch, to be honest, but I have been feeling like consuming movies lately. Maybe I'll pick something from the Oscars nominees, if you have any recs, please hit me up.
Anyways, today I am here to review Refusing Compulsory Sexuality: A Black Asexual Lens on Our Sex-Obsessed Culture by Sherronda J. Brown. As you can tell by the title, it's a non fiction book about asexuality and compulsory (cishetero)sexuality. I've been trying to read as many aroace books as I can, this month, and I wanted to include some non fiction as well. I am reading another non fiction book later this month, so stay tuned.
But without any further ado, let's get this review started.
Disclaimer
I received an e-ARC of this book (which is now available in its final and corrected form) from the publisher in exchange for an honest review via Netgalley; this does not affect my rating nor my opinions in any way. Everything you'll find in this review is what I actually think and it wasn't influenced by anyone. Thank you so much to the publisher and Netgalley for the chance to read and review this book.
About the book
Title: Refusing Compulsory Sexuality: A Black Asexual Lens on Our Sex-Obsessed Culture
Author: Sherronda J. Brown
Publisher: North Atlantic Books
Publication date: September 13, 2022
Pages: 208
Plot, as stated on Goodreads
For readers of Ace and Belly of the Beast A Black queer feminist exploration of asexuality--and an incisive interrogation of the sex-obsessed culture that invisibilizes and ignores asexual and A-spec identity. Everything you know about sex and asexuality is (probably) wrong. The notion that everyone wants sex--and that we all have to have it--is false. It's intertwined with our ideas about capitalism, race, gender, and queerness. And it impacts the most marginalized among us. For asexual folks, it means that ace and A-spec identity is often defined by a queerness that's not queer enough, seen through a lens of perceived lack: lack of pleasure, connection, joy, maturity, and even humanity. In this exploration of what it means to be Black and asexual in America today, Sherronda J. Brown offers new perspectives on asexuality. She takes an incisive look at how anti-Blackness, white supremacy, patriarchy, heteronormativity, and capitalism enact harm against asexual people, contextualizing acephobia within a racial framework in the first book of its kind. Brown advocates for the "A" in LGBTQIA+, affirming that to be asexual is to be queer--despite the gatekeeping and denial that often says otherwise. With chapters on desire, f*ckability, utility, refusal, and possibilities, Refusing Compulsory Sexuality discusses topics of deep relevance to ace and a-spec communities. It centers the Black asexual experience--and demands visibility in a world that pathologizes and denies asexuality, denigrates queerness, and specifically sexualizes Black people. A necessary and unapologetic reclamation, Refusing Compulsory Sexuality is smart, timely, and an essential read for asexuals, aromantics, queer readers, and anyone looking to better understand sexual politics in America.
My rating: 3 out of 5 stars
Review
I never know how to rate non fiction books, especially seeing as I hardly ever read them. So, take my rating with a grain of salt, and focus more on the review itself, if you can.
«I believe it is more true to say that asexuality is defined by a relationship to sex that is atypical to what has been decided on by society at large to be normative, and that atypical nature is marked by varying degrees of sexual attraction and desire».
I think this book is very thouroughly researched, you can tell that the author has collected a lot of data and read many texts on all the topics covered in here. What I didn't know before starting this book is that it is not a "pop-science" book, but truly an academic dissertation. As I don't usually read this kind of texts, it was bit too dense for me at times.
«A significant and integral part of acephobia is the stubborn refusal to recognize asexual people as authorities on our own lives, as knowers of our own sexuality».
The book does make some very interesting points, and I think many people — myself included — will feel seen while reading this. However, it seemed to me that the author reiterated the same concepts over and over again. I understand the necessity of supporting your claims with other texts and datas (I have written a thesis myself), however it was a bit too much for me personally as a reader. Had I had to study this for class, it would have been different. If you are, unlike me, a non fiction reader, you probably won't have any problems.
«Asexuality is always a site of subversion and resistance to cisheteronormativity itself, and is that not what queerness is?»
What I liked the most about the book is that it was very inclusive and intersectional, and it was extremely interesting to learn more about the intersection between misogynoir and acephobia. I would have loved if the intersection between ableism and acephobia was more explored, but I understand why the author left things as they are. I am going to look up more texts, possibly by disabled asexual writers, to learn more about this specific topic.
«Asexuals and lesbians will always be unfit for a society that only understands "women" as fit when we are sexually submissive to me».
I think some allosexual people, if they deign to read this, will feel extremely attacked by some passages, but I also believe that this was the intent, and that if they do indeed feel like they are being attacked, the point made would be proven true. I also think a lot of allo people will find out that maybe they have had their understanding of asexuality all wrong. Moreover, a lot of questioning people will find their answers.
«Not wanting sex […] is not an experience of lack, but of abundance and autonomy».
Despite my issues with the text, I would highly recommend it to anyone looking for an indepth study of asexuality. While this cannot obviously cover every single facet of the asexual experience, and doesn't focus on aromanticism as much, it is still a great book to read to find out more about cisallohet patriarchal society, asexuality, compulsory sexuality, misogynoir, racism, acephobia, healtism and how all these things intersect and what we can do to fight back.
This is going to be all for today, I will talk to you soon with a new Reading the Rainbow review.
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