One minute I was running and the next minute I was face down on a gravel pathway in the middle of a forest in the rain. We all know the feeling – whether it’s a literal stumble or a metaphorical fall – it’s the moment when everything goes wrong, when you trip, fail, hit a brick wall of disappointment, or hit the gravel road hard. The aftermath of these falls can be bruising, but it’s also where some of the most valuable lessons lie. Learning from falling and faceplanting – literally and figuratively – is an essential part of growth, resilience, and success. It’s often in these moments of vulnerability that we learn the most about ourselves and the world around us. At least I did. The Moment of the Fall: Embrace the Vulnerability Falling, whether in the physical world or within the context of personal or professional endeavours, tends to be associated with shame, embarrassment, and a sense of defeat – the moment of the fall is perceived to be the moment of the fail. The initial instinct is often to recoil, hide, or deny the fall. Hiding was difficult for me to do because I fell in public with other runners around me, wincing at my pain as if they felt it too. The vulnerability of that moment – the feeling of having failed or made a mistake in front of others – can be deeply uncomfortable. But it’s in that very discomfort that growth begins. When we faceplant – whether we trip while learning to walk, fail an exam, or make a mistake in a job interview – we are reminded of our human limitations. The fall itself is not inherently bad; it’s what we do with it that matters. Each fall, every stumble, gives us the opportunity to reassess, to recalibrate, and to embrace the vulnerability that makes us human. The act of falling is natural. It’s how we respond to the fall that shapes our ability to learn and grow. As children, we fall constantly when we are learning to walk, ride a bike, or climb a tree. Those falls are a part of the process. But somewhere along the way to adulthood, we begin to associate falling with failure, forgetting that it is through these very falls that we develop the skills, resilience, and wisdom to move forward. Faceplanting: The Power of Humility and Self-Compassion A ‘faceplant’ is more than just a stumble. It is when you literally or figuratively fall flat on your face. It’s the moment of total collapse, the time when everything seems to go wrong all at once, leaving you feeling exposed and vulnerable. The first lesson from a faceplant is humility. When you’ve fallen flat, it’s impossible to maintain any illusion of perfection or invulnerability. Whether in a professional setting, a relationship, or a personal goal, faceplanting strips away the veneer of self-assuredness. When there is blood dripping from your face, it’s impossible to maintain any illusion that it didn’t happen. Instead, you’re left with an honest recognition of your own imperfections. This humility can be liberating. It opens you up to new perspectives, helps you accept feedback, and invites the willingness to learn from others – and to make a note to self to be more careful in the future as you also embrace getting older and being less sure-footed. Second, faceplanting teaches self-compassion. It’s easy to be hard on ourselves when we fail, especially in moments of complete collapse. But the true value of a faceplant lies in how we treat ourselves afterward. Do we beat ourselves up, or do we offer ourselves the same kindness we would offer a friend who has had a fall? Learning to embrace self-compassion in the aftermath of falling or failing is crucial. It allows us to rise up, dust ourselves off, and keep moving forward without being weighed down by unnecessary guilt or shame. Embracing Failure as Part of the Process Falling or faceplanting doesn’t have to be the end of the road. It’s often just the beginning of something new. Failure is not the opposite of success; it is an integral part of the journey toward success. In fact, some of the most successful people in history attribute their achievements to the lessons they learned from their fallings or their failures. The Resilience of Getting Back Up What truly matters after a fall is how we rise. A fall, faceplant, or failure doesn’t define you – it’s your response that determines the outcome. At the heart of learning from falling is the concept of resilience – the ability to get back up after being knocked down. American singer Jon Bon Jovi is credited with saying, ‘Success is falling nine times and getting up ten.’ For me, I recall the 1997 Tubthumping song by the British band Chumbawamba with the lyrics: ‘I get knocked down, But I get up again, You’re never gonna keep me down.’ Resilience is not about avoiding failure, but about the strength to continue after it. When you fall, you learn how to pick yourself up with more awareness, understanding, and determination. For me, not being as spry as I used to be, it took a little longer to get up with the help of other runners. But, each time you rise, you build mental and emotional strength. Resilience also involves adapting to change, learning how to navigate setbacks, and maintaining a positive outlook even in the face of adversity. It’s about having the courage to try again, armed with the wisdom gained from previous falls – to keep on running. This process of getting back up after a faceplant is also essential for building confidence. With each failure, you gain more trust in your ability to navigate difficult situations, knowing that falling is just part of the learning process. Over time, the fear of failure diminishes, and the willingness to embrace challenges increases. Conclusion: The Wisdom in the Fall Falling and faceplanting might be the end of the race, but they are not the end of the road. They are pivotal moments in the journey toward personal growth, resilience, and success. Rather than avoiding failure, we should learn to view each stumble, each fall, as an opportunity to grow stronger, wiser, and more resilient. Ultimately, falling is a part of being human. It is through these moments of vulnerability that we discover new depths within ourselves and uncover the strength to rise again. So, the next time I fall – physically, emotionally, or creatively – I’ll remember that it’s not the fall that defines me, but how I get back up that is more important to me. Making my peace with falling and faceplanting, I learned the following: To acknowledge the fall - Denial or avoidance only prolongs the discomfort. There’s no shame in falling; everyone does it. To reflect on what happened – To take a moment to reflect on what led up to the fall. What happened? What could I have done differently? What did I learn about myself and the situation? To give myself time to recover - My self-made healing balm certainly sped up my recovery, but I don’t need to rush the healing process as it’s an opportunity to rest, recharge, and be kind to myself. To use the fall as fuel - Every fall can serve as motivation to rise higher. What skills or knowledge do I need to develop to prevent a fall from happening again? Should I wear my glasses while running, for example? To embrace the journey, the trip – Sometimes, the most profound personal development occurs when things don’t go according to the running plan, so I’ll embrace the unpredictability of the trip and remember that every fall adds to my knowledge about my own capabilities and my own human limitations.
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Friday, 6 December 2024
MAKING MY PEACE … with falling and faceplanting
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